I never thought I’d be THAT mom. You know the one that follows her child behavior with an explanation.

The one that apologizes profusely for his missteps.

The one that searches for an explanation, a diagnosis, something that would explain why his behavior is like it is.

Yet, here we are. He will turn five today. And that milestone has always meant so much to me.

He is thoughtful. Yet, PASSIONATE.

Kind, yet brutally honest.

Content, yet does not care in the least what ANYONE (even me, sometimes) thinks!

He is different and unique.

But my biggest fear is breaking his spirit.

Breaking that passion he has for this life so I desperately pray that this passion is used for GOOD.

We don’t have big birthdays anymore, we just invite family. And a few weeks ago when we talked about his party, Cray said he didn’t want to invite one single friend. In fact, if you want to know more about his personality, he verbatim said, “I know who I want to invite—no one!”

But then the night before his little family party he wanted to invite two little girls he’s grown up with since birth. They know him, they love him and they care for him so well. They are patient and kind and the epitome of what God says Love is. It does not judge. It does not provoke.

It’s so easy meeting a child like Cray to pass over him because he won’t exactly smile and greet you with a warm hug. But even as five year olds, these little girls haven’t given up on him. And while this may seem so silly because, after all, they’re five, yesterday when Cray was adamant about inviting them, I was almost in tears every time.


But today, it hit me. This passion he has is a GIFT. It is a gift from our Father and every so often, Father will remind me of how He writes our story. And this gift these little girls gave him in their love is that perfect symbol of the love we should give to others. And I’m writing it down here so I won’t forget how much it meant to me.

Because it was first given to us by our Father.

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13:5-7‬ ‭ESV‬‬

This is why we love.

This is why we treasure each other.

This is why we are here.

Happy birthday, Cray. Even though it’s hard sometimes, we absolutely adore you.

(Now, enjoy my scroll through memory lane..;) I LOVE this kid.)